I stood in front of him. I could hear the silent sobs in his throat. Tears falling onto his clenched hands. Looking up at me his long black straight hair just slightly covered his eyes. It was a beautifully sad sight. A handsome angel crying in grief over the loss of his brother. The sadness and madness evident in his angry cold dark blue eyes as they set themselves upon me. His streaked tears made his pale skin glisten in the lamps light. I had planned to only pay my respects. I had not planned to take hold of him and hold him close until his tears disappeared. I had not planned on his tears.

            Those wretched poisons fiends.

            “Leave.” His voice nothing but a sharpened knife. Ignoring his words I walked forward, my bare feet against the floor echoing in the silent room. His clenched hands unwound themselves and quickly gripped my exposed thighs. My heart beat rapidly in my chest.

            I was scared.

            The way his hate filled eyes stared into me and the way he tightly gripped my thighs told me to be careful. To be afraid. Still I could not leave him alone.

            I ignored the pain on my thighs and walked forward. His warm breath blew onto my stomach. Our body heats touching. Recoiling. I took one last step. My legs were in between both of his. He squeezed my thighs tighter. My hand stroked his cheek. Slowly he buried his face in my stomach, his nose just above my navel. I could feel his wet eyelashes against my skin. His arms circled around my legs squeezing me tightly against his chest. He was strong for a couple seconds before the most beautiful waterfall fell down his cheeks. I wrapped my arms around his head and pulled him tighter to me, like a mother would to her child. I slowly stroked his back comforting him. His salty tears fell onto my stomach. He sobbed silently. I didn’t know what to do or say so I just stood there letting him cry on me. It broke my heart knowing this happened because of me.

            I was the reason for his tears. If I had only chosen this would have never happened. Now not only did we lose someone we cared for but we lost each other. There is no way he could ever forgive me for what I did.

            If I had just listened...

            No, even then. If I had never gotten myself in that situation everything could have been avoided. If I had never let this happen they wouldn't have gotten into an argument. We would have never gone to that bridge. The car would have never passed by.

            Joseph would still be alive.

            Jonathan would still love me.

            And I would still be happy.

Just a white lie.

     "It was just a little white lie." He said with a small smile on his lips.
     "Nothing is small." She assured.
     "I believe you called her small and insignificant." His smirk was that of a cat catching a mouse by the tail.
     "Ah, let me rephrase. No lies are small....." She began to pile up the dirty dishes that sat upon the table. "Lies are like ships; they take time to build, once it gets off the coast it has a sea to across and sometimes they get caught in storms and plunge into the depths all within a matter of seconds everything can be destroyed and everyone aboard losses something or everything.
     The same applies to the boy who cried wolf. He told so many little white lies and in the end no one believed him. But by that point your ship has already sunk. It's already too late to dump cargo. All because a little white lie was told."
     "Then Miss. Waitress, how are your ships doing?" He asked as she walked away.
     She stopped before answering. "That depends," She looked at him over her shoulder "on which your talking about and whether or not it was on purpose." She smiled at him a kind of malicious hidden agenda smirk. It told him of a mystery he wouldn't want to uncover. A mystery too dangerous to be fun.
     He was better off and Miss. Waitress went missing that night.

Kiss after kiss,
Boy after boy,
Frog after frog,

None,
                       None,
          None.
Were her true love.

After some time she began to wonder
Perhaps true love was a lie
This curse was only a game
placed upon her by her jealous sister.

because its' my blog

• I am a cuddler
• I am a morning person
• I am an only child
• I am currently in my pyjamas
• I am currently pregnant
• I am left handed
• I am a little shy around the opposite gender at first
• I bite my nails
• I can be paranoid at times
• I enjoy country music
• I enjoy smoothies
• I enjoy talking on the phone
• I have a car
• I have/had a hard time paying attention at school
• I have a hidden talent
• I have a pet
• I have a tendency to fall for the “wrong” guy/girl
• I have all my grandparents
• I have been to another country
• I have been told that i have unusual sense of humour
• I have broken a bone
• I have caller I.D. on my phone
• I have bathed someone
• I have changed a diaper
• I have changed a lot over the past year
• I have friends who have never seen my natural hair colour
• I have had major/minor surgery
• I have killed another person
• I have had my hair cut within the last week
• I have mood swings
• I have no idea what i want to do for the rest of my life
• I have rejected someone before
• I like the taste of blood
• I love Michael Jackson
• I love sleeping
• I love to shop
• I own 100 CDS or more
• I own and use a library card
• I read books for pleasure in my spare time
• I sleep a lot during the day
• I watch soap operas on a regular basis
• I work at a job that i enjoy
• I would get plastic surgery if it were 100% safe, free of cost, and scar-free
• I am currently wearing socks
• I am tired
• I love to paint/draw/sketch/sculpt
• I consume at least one alcoholic drink each month

I have/had:

• Graduated high school
• Smoked cigarettes
• Ridden every ride at an amusement park
• Collected something really stupid
• Gone to a concert
• Helped someone
• Spun turn tables
• Watched four movies in one night
• Been broken up with
• Taken a college or university level course
• Been in a car accident
• Been in a tornado
• Watched someone die
• Been to a funeral
• Run a marathon
• Your parents got divorced
• Cried yourself to sleep
• Spent over $200 in one day
• Written a 10 page letter
• Had a best friend
• Lost someone you loved
• Skipped school
• Gotten in trouble for something you didn’t do
• Stolen books from the library
• Been in a mental hospital
• Watched the “Harry Potter” movies
• Fired a gun
• Been in a school play or production
• Been fired from a job
• Taken a lie detector test
• Swam with dolphins
• Attempted suicide
• Written poetry
• Read more than 20 books a year
• Gone to Europe
• Loved someone you couldn’t have
• Used a colouring book over age 12
• Had surgery
• Had stitches
• Taken a taxi
• Had more than 5 online conversations going at once
• Had a hamster
• Dyed your hair
• Had something pierced
• Gotten straight A’s
• Your parents sent you to a shrink
• Been handcuffed

My hair is naturally the colour:

• Light brown
• Medium brown
• Dark brown
• Blonde
• Black
• Dark blonde
• Strawberry blonde/Ginger
• Multicoloured

My eyes are:

• Brown
• Blue
• Grey
• Green
• Hazel
• Light brown
• A combination of things

I am:

• Male
• Female
• Other

Afraid of:

• Spider/other insects
• Dying
• Doctor/Dentist appointments
• Hospitals
• Needles
• Disease
• Being alone in the dark
• Heights
• Small spaces
• Oceans/large bodies of water
• Holes
• Large animals
• Small animals
• Open spaces
• Lightning

I have:

• A friend with benefits
• A laptop in my room
• A television in my room
• Good grades
• My own car
• Married parents

Don’t tell me lies

The other girls wanted to hear.

Since when have I ever been like them?

Wanting to be whispered sweet nothings in my ear,

Wanting to be given flowers whenever.

Loving me is like breathing.

Just be there and I am satisfied.

Please me like you do your lungs;

Breathe me in and regret letting me go,

Fear that you will never see me again.

Tell me you love me

And you don’t want to be without me.

But don’t lie to me

Don’t tell me you would rather die,

Than be without me,

That I am the only one

That you and I are forever.

I never asked for that.

I only asked for you to breath in my shampoo,

To listen to my heart beat,

To hear you say,

‘I love you.’

Nothing more, nothing less.

I only wanted you to stay

I wished for it all night long

As I cried myself to sleep

I only wanted you to love me

Only me

I wished for it as I saw you looking around

I only wanted you hold me

Not tell me lies

I have always been afraid.....
always been pretending to follow you closely,
always been pretending to sharpen my teeth,
when the truth is, I am...
scared to death just treading on your shadow.